Oh sure, when I don't show up for work for two weeks, because I didn't tell my superiors I was smoking a lot of opium and getting "my life straight" I get fired. But when this guy doesn't show up for two weeks he gets to "resign." Man, fuck politicians.
Jack Bauer to face 48 days in jail. I don't understand how a real American hero such as Jack Bauer couldn't possibly have received a Presidential pardon; I mean, how's a twice-convicted drunk driver like Jack Bauer s'posed to save the free-fucking-world from terror when he's behind bars? He can't, that's how.
It's Fire Prevention Week! Remember: Stop, Drop, and Roll. Especially when this friendly firelady is trying to get you out of a burning building.
"Insert clever and sexy pick up line here. *A very incredible story about the Nobel laureate for medicine. Saw his mom get arrested by Nazis, lived on the streets and then wins a Nobel Prize? Man, I've totally been slacking my whole life. Also, just a reminder of how the award came about.**
* Paul, this one's for you!
** Paul, this one's also for you!
